No huh huh kun oli hieno viikonloppu. Tuli todellakin fiilis että nyt sain rahoille vastinetta! 🙂
Kirjoitin ajatuksistani tonne Supercoach Academyn foorumille oman purkuni siitä, mitä mä nyt näen. Kopioin sen tämän viestin loppuun ja yritän kirjoitella huomenna tai viimeistään ylihuomenna suomenkielisen version JA haluan tehdä viikonlopun opeista powerpoint-videon myös, koska a) se on hauskaa ja b) uskon sen avaavan juttua paremmin teille ja itselleni.
Tosin voi olla että huomenna haluan keskittyä enemmän noihin meidän perheen mieshenkilöihin, joita olen laiminlöynyt useamman päivän…
Tiedostan että toi englanninkielinen teksti alla voi vaikuttaa tosi teoreettiselta ja vähän oudolta, koska se on kirjoitettu ihmisille, joiden kanssa olemme nyt pyöritelleet koko viikonlopun tätä teemaa. Pelko pois — tiedän jo nyt että pystyn tuomaan tämän todella konkreettiselle ja käytännölliselle tasolle.
Mulle olennaisin konkreettinen havainto oli se, että esim. jos mun mies sanoo mulle ikävästi, mun ei ihan oikeasti ole PAKKO siinä tilanteessa pahoittaa mieltäni. Tajusin että tähän asti olen ajatellut että “joo joo, tiedän että mun omat ajatukseni aiheuttavat nämä mun fiilikset, mutta minkä mä voin sille, että mun miehen käytös herättää mussa nämä ajatukset?”
Niinpä sen ajatuksen lisäksi että “mies ei tykkää musta kun se sanoo noin” mun ahdistusta lisäsi moninkertaisesti ajatus “mä en voi olla ajattelematta tätä ajatusta”, koska se sai mut tuntemaan että olen sen tilanteen ja ajatuksen vanki.
Nyt näen jotenkin superkristallinkirkkaasti miten oikeasti mä valitsin kummankin ajatuksen (vaikka valinta tapahtui silmänräpäyksessä) ja että mikä tahansa hetki mä voin nähdä tämän tilanteen uudessa valossa eli toisin sanoen saada uuden ajatuksen.
Eli että se, että olen hetki sitten ajatellut tietyllä tavalla ei tarkoita ettenkö voisi ajatella seuraavassa hetkessä uudella tavalla. Jo tämän selkeästi näkeminen saa mut rentoutumaan ja tuntemaan itseni vapaaksi, mikä puolestaan edesauttaa sen uuden ajatuksen syntymistä!
Ja näen nyt, miten kaikki eri tekniikat (NLP, hypnoosi jne.) toimivat, koska ne saavat meidät ajattelemaan uusia ajatuksia tai ainakin avaavat meidän mielen uusille ajatuksille. Paitsi että se johtaa nopeasti suohon, jossa alkaa korjata ajatusta toisensa perään —  kun taas jos näkee ettei ajatuksissa sinällään ole vikaa ja että ihmismieli on “ajatuksia automaattisesti korjaava ja mielenrauhaan pyrkivä järjestelmä” voi antaa ajatustensa olla rauhassa ja korkeintaan välillä vauhdittaa uuden ajatuksen löytämistä muistamalla että voin ajatella joka hetki mistä tahansa asiasta ihan uudella tavalla.
Näin säästyy aikaa ja energiaa ja voi keskittyä olennaisempaa, kuten oman nettisivustonsa tuunaamiseen ja webcastien tekemiseen. Tai perheensä seurasta nauttimiseen. (Huomatkaa järjestys jossa nämä tuli mulle mieleen, hah hah! )
Eli huomiseen (tiistaihin) tai mahdollisesti teidän ylihuomiseen (keskiviikko)!
SCA Foorumille kirjoittamani viesti:
Wow! I’m not surprised if at the end of my life I’ll see that this was one of the most important weekends of my life. Seriously guys (and gals).
On my way to home a sentence from Paul McKenna’s hypnosis tape(s) was playing in my head: “thoughts can be thought, but you DON’T HAVE TO think them (the part written in caps came louder in my head).
Right now I see and feel like I was in a tiny box and now the walls of my box just fell down and all I can see is this vast universe that goes on and on and on without any borders.
THIS IS SO COOL.
OK, in case you are now wondering if I was in a different seminar this weekend than you were or if I did drugs on my way home (or at this morning ;-), let me try to explain what I’m seeing.
Who knows, maybe this resonates with you. Or maybe you’ll just think “oh, you mean you didn’t see THAT before, you silly blonde — I’ve known that always/for years.”
THE PRINCIPLES according to Katri
1. We are thinking at any given minute but we’re not our thoughts.
2. Thoughts create ALL of our feelings.
3. We ARE the MIND that thinks the thoughts and feels the feelings.
4. Consciousness = mind choosing the thoughts and feeling the feelings.
4.1. Consciousness is our experience of being unique and separate from others, because it’s us being aware that we (the mind) is the only one thinking that particular thought and feeling that particular feeling in that particular moment.
5. The mind is (i.e. we are) whole, perfect and flawless — now and always, because it is unchangeable.
5.1. This is why we and very old people can feel at the times that they’re the same person who they were when they were kids.
6. Mind (= we) is that energy that is part of all the energy (i.e. “bigger mind”/universal mind/god/spirit)
6.1. Just like a drop of water taken out of the ocean is still in a way one with the ocean — release the drop back to the ocean and it doesn’t exist as a water drop anymore.
7. The nature of nature is to first sustain life and then conserve energy whenever possible.
7.1. The nature of human mind is to make choices that seem to conserve energy and sustain life.
7.2. The nature of human (and animal) thinking is to recognize patterns whenever possible in order to save energy.
7.3. The nature of human (and animal) mind is to return to the neutral state (into the peace of mind/inner well being whenever possible in order to save energy (and sustain life).
8. The mind chooses (i.e. we choose) each and every thought we ever have.
8.1. In order to save energy the mind prefers to recognize patterns and choose the similar thoughts in similar situations — as long as the thought seems to be some manner life sustaining (i.e. good for us).
8.2. Since each and every thought is chosen by us — thought by thought — we CAN choose a new thought in any given moment.
8.3. The illusion of external stimulus “making” us (as in “forcing” us) to think and feel something comes from not understanding that we choose each and every thought moment and moment and that we’re just choosing this particular thought over and over again in this kind of situation, even though we COULD choose any other thought too (see more below)
9. The lifespan of one single thought and the feeling following it is very short — in order to create an illusion of a continuous thought and feeling, we have to choose the same thought again and again and again.
9.1. Even if you seem to choose the same thought over and over again, it does change every time you re-choose it
— often the thought starts to feel stronger “and more real” every time you re-choose it, because it now feels a tiny bit more familiar than the last time you chose to think it (like a nano-second ago)
— sometimes the thought degenerates or change like a message in a kid’s play “broken telephone” (where the first kid says something to second kid, who says to the third kid what he heard etc.).
9.2. Sometimes we choose a completely new thought in a blink of an eye (like if you are suddenly startled or asked a totally unrelated question).
I reserve ALL the rights to be absolutely wrong about this — and I welcome you to challenge my thoughts (!) about this, so that I’ll see if I really understand this the way I experience understanding this.
Some sources that contribute to my understanding:
— Â Watch Jill Bolte Taylor’s My Stroke of Insight (again) to see how her experience of being one with all (including wall etc.) is the mind and how the thoughts are just thoughts.
— New York Times article about our habits.
— Two most mind blowing books I’ve read about human mind EVER: Mistakes were made but not by me and Invisible Gorilla. I highly recommend these books if you really want to understand the nature of our mind (i.e. how we prefer to think)
— Small babies and all the animals — if you observe them for longer periods of time it becomes really clear, that even though they might get every now and then on some kind of state of arousal (e.g. excited or scared) they return to a some kind of neutral, calm and energy saving state whenever possible.
— George Pransky mentioned today in a conversation that a neurologist told him that pain without a thought of pain unpleasant, pain would feel like pressure and burning sensation. Having gotten a few tattoos (i.e. having gone through a painful experience by choice) and having given a birth to a baby while “controlling” my pain with thoughts for several hours, I agree with this notion.
— Orgasm with a negative thought is not pleasurable at all to a women who have a rare condition, where they get up to 100 orgasms per day.
— The physiological reaction (i.e. feeling) after an angry thought lasts only 90 seconds. If you’re feeling angry longer than that, it’s because you’re rethinking the angry thought.
OTHER THOUGHTS
— So in essence every thought is based on a new choice. It just doesn’t look like it, because the mind prefers to save energy by choosing thoughts that have worked in the past in a similar situation.
— Just because something works or seems to be working doesn’t mean that there isn’t a better choice available. We’re not choosing the better option because we don’t see it. We don’t see it if we believe that:
a) the choice we make is best or least worse there is to be made
b) there isn’t any other choice to be made (for instance we believe  “this is real” — when it really isn’t).
— The “side effect” of mind’s AMAZING pattern recognition skill (as demonstrated with several excellent examples in Mistakes were made but not by me and Invisible Gorilla) is that it often sees patterns also there were there really isn’t any natural patterns.
FOR EXAMPLE
We believe we have a “relationship dynamic” in a particular moment when our spouse says something mean and in that moment we choose a thought “my spouse doesn’t love me”
…AND when we at the same time remember all those times we chose to think “my spouse doesn’t love me” in a similar situation.
…AND at the same time totally ignore all those times when we chose to think in a similar situation that “oh, my poor spouse is having a really bad day, I’ll make him a nice meal to make him feel better”.
Question: What would happen, if we would truthfully remember all the different ways we’ve thought when our spouse said something mean to us AND all those times when we chose to think “my spouse doesn’t love me” when the spouse said something nice or neutral or didn’t say anything at all — or wasn’t even there?
My answer: We would totally see that we can choose any thought in that moment and that even though we chose to react to what our spouse said by considering to choose a bad or good thought, it was us choosing to listen to him and to take into account what he said.
WHY DOES A LOVING PERSON SEEM TO “LIFT” THE ENERGY IN THE ROOM?
Because the nature of the mind is to first sustain life and then save energy. Love is the most life sustaining feeling there is, so it makes very often sense to the mind to choose a loving thought in a presence of a loving person — BUT NOT ALWAYS.
If our previous thoughts were “This song reminds me of that old boyfriend who broke my heart”, “it is dangerous to fall in love”, “I (choose to) believe nobody loves me” and “I hate people who go around pretending to be loving”, then it might make sense to our mind to disregard a loving person entering the room, because that is not in line with the “logical” thought pattern the mind just “saw”.
AND if a calm and centered person entering a room full of angry people calms the everyone else down, what makes that loving person be the first one in the room thinking loving thoughts and feeling centered and calm even though the others are going crazy? It just happens to make more sense to that person in that particular moment.
THOUGHTS CAN BE THOUGHT BUT YOU DON’T HAVE TO THINK THEM
A thought that I could control my thoughts at all times is just a thought. We can’t do that, because the nature of our mind is to sustain life and conserve energy. Trying to control all of your thoughts does neither of those things.
Most of the time the mind works — we work — quite well in the world. And then the mind chooses to think that “there’s something wrong with the way this works”, because at that moment it seems like a really good idea to think that. Who knows why. That’s not important.
My father often says: “You can’t judge historical decisions with your current knowledge.”
Sure, if you would have known before (like two seconds ago) what you know now, you might have chosen differently. But you didn’t, so it makes no sense to waste energy and life on wondering why you chose to think what you thought. It’s gone. Done. No reason to feel bad about it.
What happened, happened. Now, move on.
What is important? To see that just because the mind just chose a thought doesn’t mean that you have to choose that same thought again.
THERE ARE NO BELIEFS!!!
There’s just me (aka a mind that prefers to see patterns everywhere) in this moment:
• choosing a similar thought that it chose in a similar situation at least once before, because it seemed to work somehow the last time
• choosing to remember all those times it chose a similar thought in a similar situation
• choosing to ignore all those times it chose a different thought in a similar situation
• choosing to ignore all those times it chose the similar thought in a totally unrelated situation
• choosing to think that this is the only possible thought to be chosen in this moment
THERE’S NO PERSONA OR PERSONALITY
There’s just me (aka a mind) in this moment:
• choosing a thought “I’m this kind of person” — because it seems to be energy saving, life supporting or otherwise beneficial thought in that moment
• choosing to remember all those times when I behaved like “this kind of person” to “prove” that thought to be true
• choosing to ignore all those times when I didn’t behave like “this kind of person”
• choosing to think that it is impossible for me to be a person that sometimes behaves one way in a certain kind of situation and other times behaves totally different way in a certain kind of situations — or at least COULD behave in any way in that kind of situation, but just happens to choose the way that seems in that moment best or less bad option.
BEAUTIFUL MIND
• I love the nature of my mind — that is, I LOVE ME
• I love knowing that my mind — ME! — is perfect and pure and part of a bigger mind, just like a drop of water from ocean is part of the ocean.
• I love knowing that my nature is to return to that neutral, calm “energy saving mode”, where I’m closest to being the ocean and not just a single drop of water — OR in other words: experiencing more of being the mind and experiencing less thinking the thoughts and feeling the feelings.
• I love knowing that my nature is to choose always what seems to be best and the most life sustaining in that moment — even when in hindsight someone may argue that it was a bad decision.
• AND MOST OF ALL: I love knowing that the mind really chooses all the thoughts, even when I don’t pay attention to the process — and that I the mind can always choose to think a new thought, if it seems to be more life sustaining than the old thought.
GOOD FEELING vs BAD FEELING
(The following percentages are totally made up)
When you choose a thought that is 100 % in line with sustaining life and saving energy (i.e. a thought you’ve thought before in that kind of situation), you feel super good.
When you choose a thought that is 50-90 % opposite to sustaining life but 100 % saving energy (i.e. a thought you’ve thought before in this kind of situation), you feel bad or even horrible.
When you choose a thought that is 100 % in line with sustaining life and 0 % of saving energy because it’s a new thought, you’ll feel some discomfort, but since sustaining life is the mind’s #1 “task”, you’ll eventually choose it anyway.
NO MATTER WHAT I DO, ALL IS WELL
Seeing how I’m the mind who chooses every single thought and how I can have a new thought in any given moment, even though my mind prefers to choose “old thoughts” to conserve energy, lets me think:
I AM FREE.
I’m not a victim of circumstances and a prisoner of my own thoughts.
Everything is just perfect — even a thought that everything is not perfect. I chose that thought because it seemed like a really good thought for that moment. And the moment I see that a certain thought doesn’t sustain life anymore, I will have a new thought.
